something called mental block and boring life is making this blog rather stagnant. haven't been out except to school and supermarket. and finally we had the authentic peking duck (though i didn't eat any, heh) and finally some photos..

all plates cleared, all food gone.

posing with the duckie before a slow walk home.
see how much clothings we pile on ourselves every time we have to get out, and see what i mean by turning white!
a big thank you to oi's dad for that big meal. looks like we stuff ourselves with good food once a week =)
been sleeping quite early these days because i'm not in the mood to study and have nothing better to do.
and i'm spending more time cracking nuts than eating them, and more time eating them then studying!
...
me: so when are you coming over?
mom: around 20th
me: hmmm ok, but i got paper on 24th
mom: then i go the weekend after that?
me: can, but i got another paper on the 1st.
mom: then when am i allowed to visit you before i go there and get frozen? you took all the jackets and i have to wear your ntu jacket now!
...

天天都有落叶特别是今夜
当沙沙的风吹每一片叶掉一滴泪
夜夜有人心碎他们相信谁
当爱被解了约作何感觉
莫非无尤也无悔依旧痴痴收藏落叶
傻的心傻到哭也流不出泪
我无所谓我冷若冰淡若水
我不为梦留一点空侵掠我紧闭心扉
当感情是唯一解不开的结
而人爱听谁伤了谁
我愿是风中飘然轻落的叶
我无所谓我伤过心掉过泪
我只在乎爱本无罪
何苦要陷入重围
当世界被感情蒙上一曾灰而我
宁愿是最后的落叶

立冬前的那晚格外暖和，是秋最后的告白吧，门前墙上的红叶，也一天天地飘落。本来想出去透一透气，让冷风清醒清醒脑袋，但公园里的景慕太美了，儿童在放风筝，在满地的落叶中寻找那最红的一片。老人们在聊天散布，慢慢地聊着生活的琐碎。情侣坐在树下谈情说爱，在徐徐飘落的树叶中互相取暖。只有我一个绕着公园转了一圈又一圈，让着眼前的景物一次又一次，一幕又一幕地荡过。
过去常犹豫叶子的离开是风的追求，还是树的不挽留。我想如今已找到答案了。

another weekend has passed and it's november now. quite an eventful weekend though.
saturday was basically spent walking. after spending hours walking around in circles trying to find our way to the summer palace where we walked supposedly another 8km around kunming lake. supposedly 8km because we had so much fun stopping to take photos along the way that all the road marshals were gone and we had to navigate the way back ourselves and took the shortcut instead. it was a nice and scenic walk, romantic i would say, and the wind was soooo strong it almost blew us away!
sunday was spent out, finally collected my atm card and walked around the area before heading back for dinner at the jap restaurant beside our house. authentic style with a private room to ourselves and waitresses dressed in kimono. unlimited flow of fresh sashimi, salmon, tempera and everything else for less than 60rmb. too full to move or even laugh at our unglam photos after that! and who else can we blame other than ourselves for the consequences of over-eating?
如果风能吹起湖面的波浪，能吹落树上的枫叶，就让它带走一切吧

after hearing all the horror stories, i am so thankful for my boring and monotonous life as a full-time student and part-time housewife. waking up in early in the morning making myself some nice hot breakfast, pile on layers of clothes, scarf, boots, gloves etc. walking to school, going home just before the sun sets to cook dinner, and back to my room where i'm suppose to study. dinner's probably the highlight of the day, sitting around the table together for some simple, delicious and healthy home-cooked food with a lot less oil than outside, and no msg. although our home is not the best in terms of furnishing and renovation, and it gets really cold at night even though all the windows are closed, i'm loving this homely feeling.
school's been hectic though it's just mainly classroom lessons now. apart from the boring theory lessons which we can't escape, it's quite exciting poking needles into ourselves and friends, getting free massage by practising tuina skills on each other. what else can i ask for? life sounds great so far doesn't it?
ok, it's getting late and really cold now. time to hide under my layer of blanket and quilt with 2 layers of clothes hugging my little hot hand-warmer. nights get as cold as close to zero degrees celcius now and i can't wait for the central heating to be switched on.

原本可以睡懒觉的星期六早晨，我们却比平常更早起床，太阳还未露出它温暖的笑容我们已收拾好了东西出门了。目的只有一个，那就是尽早抵达香山欣赏秋天的红叶。经过了近两个小时的城铁与公交，穿过了拥挤的车龙和人群终于到达了目的地。以为可以看到满地布满红枫叶的我们难免有点失望。一眼望去香山还是绿色的，只是多了点红色的点缀。我们一路走一路照相留念，轻轻松松一路上有说有笑地走到了山底。上山的路更是挤满了人，大大小小老老少少都是为了目睹这秋天的美而来。我们也只能跟着人群慢慢一步一步地往上走。终于在中午走到了山顶，找了一片空石头坐下来歇息，并欣赏眼前的风景。下山时我们选坐缆车，体验一下高高在上的感觉。但高处不胜寒，一点儿也没说错，冷风迎面而来入骨而吹，冻得我们手脚冰冷，连照相都难。就这样我们下了山，完成了这次的香山之旅。


登山队伍



远方的红叶

冷风

终于到了山顶！

人山人海


我试着体会诗人曾说过的霜叶红于二月花，更是因为可以远离污染和喧哗而感到心旷神怡。但红叶也不过是掉落前短暂的光彩，一种另类的美。

星期天我们到了北大，观赏了那儿的文化节，也参观了那古色古香的校舍。



在图书馆前面

未名湖

已经习惯这季节的变化，也爱上了落叶的美。
也终于领悟了不是你的东西终究不属于你。

it was finally over, the horrible exams. and it was time to chill on that chilly night.
we walked down the shopping street, had dinner at a small restaurant, walked down the small dark street with shops selling everything needed for the ill, injured and dead. finally reached the lake. but that was just a lake (or sea) and we were not there to fish. so we braved through the rain, trying our best to avoid puddles of water but our jeans were still wet and toes were to numb to be felt. then we finally heard music and saw lights. wanted to chill at some atas-looking pub with liveband playing english songs, but it was so noisy, smoky, expensive and the minimum per table was 400yuan. obviously we just wanted to chill so we walked back and found ourselves in a nice cosy pub singing emo chinese songs.

we were there a month ago in tanktops and skirts. now we're all wrapped up.

upstairs beside the windows overlooking the sea so dark at night. even the beer's called 'chill'

i want:
- pilot g-tec pens
- tombo hi-lighters (the whole set)
- pentel liquid paper
NOW!!!

and so my adventure in this city continues, yesterday i took my new toy out to explore the CBD area and to enquire about the cali fitness here. first time on the road wasn't too bad. here in BJ everyone has a right of way. the cars don't stop for pedestrians when turning even when the green man is on, the pedestrians cross even when red man is on, bicycles weave in and out of traffic, and even against the flow, and i hear the cars honk every moment even though i stay on the 18th floor and i'm not beside a major road. so the golden rule of getting anywhere is: just go.
alright, so i managed to find the place (and the building is really called 'the place') after about half an hour. it was a sunday and CBD was very very empty. one word to describe the area: awesome! architects are really cool ppl when then can make all the buildings look so good and unique.

the big apple!! haha. they were having some apple fair and the whole big apple is made up of real apples. cool right?
managed to find the gym without much difficulty and it's awesome! and very empty. it's really better than those in Singapore, maybe cos it's newer and very few ppl go there. i wonder how's the crowd during peak hour cos yesterday almost all the 2 rows of treadmill were empty and the class has less than 10 ppl. and half were not chinese. they even have a medicine ball abs machine where it's like those basketball game you find in arcades just that you throw medicine ball and you can lie back and do crunches each time you throw a ball. they even have a basketball court (cos its endorsed by yaoming) and a room for taiji and yoga etc. not to mention the changing rooms with big and pretty chairs in front of the mirrors and shower cubicles with soap, shampoo, conditioner and surprisingly, doors! (even those in s'pore only have shower curtains). now comes the sad part. they don't have records of international members in their system so i can only use the gym upon producing my membership card, which i lost!! bleah!!! and membership is damn freaking expensive! since they are so secretive about the price, i shall just say it's about 10 times (or even more) than the any normal gym around my house area. and i will definitely wear mask next time i go out on wheels again.

say 'eeeewwwwww' but that's the amount of dust i get EVERYDAY in my room (and i love magic-clean though it's so hard to find here) now just imagine what i've inhaled. won't be surprised if my lungs turn black soon.
meanwhile i shall just go run in park on days with good weather and i'm going to get that set of dumbbells.
teach me how to convert back to healthy lifestyle when munching on junk is inevitable, beer's cheaper than water, i need stimulants like caffeine to get me studying, and i concuss unknowingly on top of my bed almost every night, waking up in the middle of the night by the cold, and the list goes on..

the past week has been spent hiding at home, in our rooms, cramping as much information from the textbook into our brains as possible for the first exam here in BJ. and it was horrendous. the late nights almost made me doze off in the middle of the paper, and it certainly didn't help by sitting next to the window, listening to the workers singing as they work downstairs. oh well, just hope the next paper won't be as bad.
Now i don't mind being a permanent housewife. my mom will be never believe me when i tell her i really do enjoy cooking and cleaning up the house, that coming from someone who does absolutely zero housework back at home and always leaves her room in a mess.
and we are all turning super auntie by spending our lunch breaks doing grocery shopping, going to class after lunch break with bags of vegetables, comparing how much money is saved by buying things on sale in supermarkets, where to buy cheap and good stuff, and discussing how often we clean the house, etc. etc. speaking of food, i really miss sambal kangkong, curry fishhead, fish soup, horfun, economic beehoon, peanut pancake, botak jones, aston, fanciful pasta, yong tau foo!! ben and jerry's, GOOD COFFEE!!! mom, quick come and save me!!
SGD keeps dropping, the sun sets at 5.30pm, the weather is ever-changing, usually around 10 degrees at night, and goes as high as 26/27 degrees during the day. things i do everyday without fail: clean my room floor, think about what to cook, check weather forecast, exchange rate, horoscope (just for fun)
now should i convince myself that people change?

作夜开始下起的那场小雨，将今天的气温下降到了新的最低点。早上冒着雨走去家乐福买点儿东西，体会那早晨的雨露，那微风轻轻地吹过。每天都走过的那一条街，却见证了我每天不一样的心情。雨水虽然带走了薄薄的烟雾，也可洗掉脸上的眼泪，但却洗不掉内心的泪水，更带不走心中的寒冷。是否要等到它结冰才能麻醉那说不出又摸不着的痛。

can't believe one week of golden week has just passed like that! what constructive things have i done? none, really.. only destructive ones and the list will just get longer.
yesterday was quite a long and dramatic day. left home early in the morning to go shopping at the wholesale centre behind the zoo, cos they close at 4pm! and i'm such a fast and efficient shopper, just went there to get what i needed. bought a coat, 2 pants, 2 boots, and some other things which couldn't escape my temptation along the way. and as i was choosing and trying on the boots at my last stop, i lost my wallet!! some damn pickpocket stole it!! tmd! had to go through all the trouble of canceling and replacing my credit cards etc again! luckily i didn't bring my IC here, and luckily i took out most of my money, so i guess that thief must have been quite disappointed to find less than 100yuan inside (and a fifty dollar SGD note, if he's smart enough to change it). and the drama doesn't end here. we were lazy to cook so i decided to buy back some dumplings from the market behind the busstop where i had to alight. and there my dearest housemates called to say that we're out of electricity! it wasn't a blackout, it's just that we forgot to top-up our electricity card (yeah electricity is pre-paid here) and best thing is all banks were closed by then. so we knocked on the glass doors of the bank since there were people inside still. and thank goodness they don't operate law-by-law here, this friendly guy came out from nowhere and asked if we need help. he managed to get us into the bank and asked the people there to switch on the machine so that we can buy our electricity. if not we had to walk even further to a 24hour place or enjoy candlelight the whole night, without hot water to bathe. phew!
now i'm finally more or less settled in my new house, and here's some photos of my nice little corner..

that's my bed, with bedsheets brought over from home (that doesn't fit perfectly) and 2 big ikea cushions, and a small and simple bedside table from ikea too

that's the place where i'm suppose to be studying, luckily it's long enough for all my junk (which is really minimal)

my wardrobe, and that's almost all the clothes i have, including the first drawer of clothes (so much less than what i have back home), and i pasted the mirror myself (from ikea too)

my cute little bedroom slippers, so soft and comfy!

a place to gather when the hungry stomach growls, love the water dispenser, getting hot water can't be more convenient

living room, with our new and pretty purple sofa. very nice to sink in too.

kitchen. where all the yummy food comes from!
and here's photos of our first 2 attempts at cooking:

first home-cooked meal of egg and tomato, chicken with capsicum and fungus, potato and carrot soup.

our second attempt of egg and chives, mushroom and tofu, and pork ribs and lotus soup.
see we can cook!! and we just found out that the little eatery downstairs do provide delivery. looks like we won't starve in winter anymore!
brrrr... it's raining now and tonight's a cold night...

就这样度过了四个星期。每天和旭日一起升起，在半梦半醒中与几乎动弹不得的车龙一起在车笛声中被送到医院。昨天傍晚的车特别多，也走得特别慢。我听着音乐，望出窗外那橙红色的太阳渐渐落下。杨柳也低下了头进入梦乡。是否有人也在欣赏这初秋的美？还是叹息着夏天的离开，寒冷的到来？
但天冷不是冷，心寒才是寒。

i locked myself out of my own room today and my hands are so dry they're cracking! help i really need hand cream now..
furniture shopping has never been so fruitful, although we had to brave through the drizzle and chilly air to find the place, which wasn't exactly directly next to the subway station. looking forward to seeing all the furniture being delivered, especially the pretty purple puffy sofa. from the standard of the toilets, i guess that place is definitely not for tourists. well, you're wrong if you think olympics has brought an end to the 'traditional' china toilets. we saw it and used it yesterday. it wasn't the worst i've ever seen but definitely the worst so far on this trip. there were cubicles, just no doors, and there were people happily doing their business and even reading at the same time!! now i know how they train their leg muscles haha.
and we've come to realise that everything is 10 minutes away according to the locals. the answer we get when asking for directions is always "前面拐个弯儿，走十分钟就到了。" either they walk super fast, or their watches move super slow, their 10 min is at least half an hour la!
temperature's dropping fast and everyone's falling sick!! shoo germs shoo!

autumn has finally arrived. if only the weather can remain like this everyday, walking in the midday sun to get lunch, yet feel the nice cool breeze... but it's starting to get dry too. after a long day in school being one another's patients, the auntie selling bing tang hu lu outside our hostel gate simply made my day! cheap sour sanzhas coated with sweet and crunchy sugar. yummy!!
tonight's the coldest night so far, and being crazy enough, i went jogging in t-shirt and shorts, in the 15 degree celcius drizzle. but it felt good. the track was more or less empty, and the cold just makes you run faster, without sweat! was watching the local news when i got back to my room after dinner and it says it's going to be cold tomorrow.

我用寂寞来惩罚我
看着你走过
要什么当时不说
此刻能有你倾听我
轻轻的转着
那是种感觉以后让人想哭的快乐

when the temperature drops a degree or two each day, when the sun sets earlier and night falls. when darkness and cold surrounds,yes i know, olympics is over, and fall's coming and so is the traffic jam. and that means waking up earlier, reaching back later, more time spent on buses moving about 10m every minute, and can forget about cabbing cos walking is probably faster.
so this weekend was pretty exciting saying goodbye to 21. met up with friends and checked out the other parts of this city, the night life..
if there's anything special to do on the special day, i did, i stayed in the whole day and went in and out of sleep. the rain wouldn't stop, the ground was wet and it was cold

things are getting less and less exciting here. no more sightsee-ing and carefree shopping. although we did still go shopping after the whole morning of a series of unfortunate events. it first began with our super blur agent not knowing what documents were needed and the operating hours for us to make our residence pass, resulting in us having to pon lessons just to find our way to a super ulu police station, which the first 2 cab drivers didn't even know how to get there, and the third one had to use the map for help. the officer there wasn't very friendly and nobody ever mentioned that we needed another document which we had to get from another office. luckily it wasn't that far away. and so all these took up the whole morning, and totally ruined our moods for the day. not to mention a super boring afternoon lesson. but we did go shopping after that for winter clothes, and i wonder when is winter coming..
i guess i still quite like it here though, hostel's fun but i am quite excited about moving into a new house that i can say it's mine (though it's just rented). it's fun having friends staying just beside, going to school, going out and for dinner together. and the nights are perfect for jogging. emo i know, and i know i shouldn't, but i can't, because every step brings me further, every sweat brings out my fear, and every song brings back memories..

I survived the first week of school!! ok, barely..
so here's an account of my daily routine as a student:
morning, first alarm rings at 6am, reluctantly gets out of bed at around 6.10, wash up, change, pack bag, clear dustbin, 6.30 second alarm rings, time to get ready to get out of the room, switch off aircon, check everything's in order and leaves the room. go downstairs for breakfast, which consists of porridge, 2 paos, 1 egg and milk or coffee everyday!! so boring! and i will die of high cholesterol if i eat an egg a day la! then about 7am walk out to the road to take the school bus to hospital. lessons start promptly at 8am and ends at 11.30 (with a half an hour break in between)and then comes my favorite part of the day: 2 hour lunch break!! just enough time to go out and search for good food and walk around, do grocery shopping etc. oh do let me mention the hospital canteen, it's at the basement of one of the old buildings and there's only 1 stall selling dumplings and another selling rice. and you have to bring your own lunchbox and utensils. feels like a prison there! and so we venture out to the nearby foodcourt or those finger food selling at the basement of the supermarket. and then comes 1.30 when we have to sit at our desks again for the afternoon lessons which usually ends at around 5. and there's the school bus again to send us back to hostel. i feel like a primary school kid la!! ok, i'm quite a morning person so i'm not complaining about having to wake up early, at least the weather's good. afternoon lessons are hell. imagine walking back from lunch in the hot midday sun(yeah it's still damn hot now!!) sit in a damn stuffy classroom with no fans. it feels like an oven!!
i thought i came here to learn tcm, but apparently i'm taking a medicine crash course in chinese! if memorizing anatomy in english wasn't bad enough, try re-learning it in chinese, all the terms and names of diseases, enzymes etc.. without notes. i feel as if i've learnt a month's worth of info within 1 week!
let me continue with my day.. reach back room, time to nua, or maybe go for a jog and then it's time for dinner. after which time just passes very quickly.. attempt to study, bathe, wash clothes, figuring out my computer and before i know it, it's time to sleep! and the cycle just repeats. boring right?
well, finally the weekend is here! just went shopping after class this evening and going for more tomorrow. monday shall be spring cleaning day for our new apartment. yeah, monday is midautumn holiday here. mid-autumn my foot la, it's still summer la, as hot as singapore!! why didn't i bring my shorts, skirts and sleeveless here!!
have i mentioned that i can't find decent foolscap paper here? and i found banana nut crunch and other flavours of post breakfast cereal at a super atas supermarket going for RMB60!!!!

hello world from the city of olympics 2008 and welcome to Beijing! and hurrays blogspot can still be seen here. one week has passed and so many things to do in the past week, and i'm too lazy to blog.
at least now i FINALLY get to use internet in the comfort of my own room with my own macbook which is running on windows IN CHINESE!! why? because the dumb software that the sch uses for broadband can only run in windows. long story of how i eventually got here, so save that for bedtime next time..
the weather here is still hot, pollution is coming back and walking is becoming my main mode of exercise. hostel canteen food is damn cheap and oily and i hate school!!! though today's only the first day. if a crash course in pathology wasn't bad enough, try it in chinese, all the medical terms etc etc... faints.

this will probably the last post here if what ppl say about not being able to view blogspot in china is true. less than 6 hours time and i'll be in the air, waking up to find myself in a brand new environment.
after a crazy night at sportsball, seeing so many drunk and gone people, and getting a lil high myself, i decided to stay at home and have home-cooked food for the last day.
still can't believe the day is here already, so much unknowns lying ahead, so much memories left behind. farewell singapore, i'll be back soon...

有一种想见不能见的伤痛
有一种爱还埋藏在我心中
我只能把你放在我的心中
这一种想见不能见的伤痛
让我对你的思念越来越浓
我却只能把你 把你放在我心中

Beijing 2008 may be over for olympics, but it's not over for me. in fact, next week this time, i do hope i can find some internet connection to get in touch with the rest of the world.
these few weeks have been busy with meeting up with people and a rather unsuccessful packing attempt. think my mom gave up on me and decided to do most of the packing for me.
finally got my hard disk after braving through the crowd today at comex. now it's time to pack all those memories into my little (well, not really) time capsule; open it and revisit when i feel like it..

不想睡，是因为不想让今天结束，不愿看着一天一天插身而过，不敢想像那天的到来。
不想醒，是因为不想让美梦结束，不愿看见梦境中的美景消失,不敢面对那残酷的现实。
不想走，是因为不想离开这温暖，不愿留下这美好的回忆，不敢面对那陌生的世界。
不想留，是因为不想呆在原地不走，不愿看着机会一个一个溜走，不敢辜负你们的期望。
不想爱，是因为不想被思念缠绕，不愿改变现有的幸福，不敢许下永恒的承诺。
不想忘，是因为不想忘记你的好，不愿失去曾拥有的一切，不敢走出那温暖的怀抱。
如果现有的幸福快乐只是和将来的寂寞相比较，为何是如此逼真？我恨命运如此的作弄，更恨它这样无情的玩笑。
如果说现在的别离是为了下一次的相聚，请挥手说再见而不是告辞。

"today we went to the zoo. we saw many animals, there were tigers, lions, zebras, monkeys. we also watched two performances and it rained during the second performance. but i was still very happy, i love animals."

ok, that's probably what my little sister would write in her diary and that just summarized what i did today. it's part of our plan of seeing as much of singapore as we can before we leave and since admission was free, why not? and because everyone else is so busy it was left with the 2 of us. nevertheless, it was fun visiting the animals again though nothing much has change. besides tourists, there were a lot of kindergarten kids, even primary school kids. lucky annoying kids haha.

once a superstar, now a statue..
wow it looks like there's still super a lot of things to do in singapore in these 10 days, and i haven't started packing at all!!!

thanks to my shuffle that i found this song and thanks lulu for teaching me how to upload it heh. was listening to this on my way to school today. such a sweet voice for such an emo song that almost made me tear and made me swim for one whole hour until they divided the pool for some kind of aqua aerobics.
been watching the olympics these few days since i'm so free. so many world records broken, so many dreams realised, yet a mistake at the crucial moment, an injury at the wrong time and all the hard work for 4 years is all but nothing.. that's the reality of sports..

i've been awake since 2 plus in the morning and watching shows on my lappie cos i slept at 9pm last night! not used to being at home so early and having nothing to do. actually i do have a lot of things to pack and get ready but i just can't get myself to do it. how more happening can my friday night get? but i'm not complaining cos it did feel good to just sleep as and when i like and not having to worry about anything. somemore i've been out and up too much for the past few days, it's time to recover from the lack of early-night sleep. of course i caught the table tennis semis, yay, finally a cookie after almost half a century! well done team singapore!!
now who's the kiasu one who just got a whole bag of medication to bring to BJ, and both my arms are aching from a typhoid jab on the left and a hep A jab on the right. now which arm should my flu jab go when the stock arrives next week? who says i'm not doing any preparations? haha
everybody had their unglam times, just be glad there weren't too many people around to see..

since we can't seem to get away from this topic everyday, in every conversation and still having no conclusion. since we're turning 22 and we're a year into adulthood and soon going to see the numbers increase exponentially, it's time to think about our lives, our future.
it's amazing (and scary) how our dreams and desires change as we grow up. when we were younger, we had bigger dreams. we wanted to be a doctor, a lawyer, a teacher; we wanted a big house, a luxurious car, money, kids, a happy family. then as we grow older we realise those were all dreams, we knew we had to face reality, nothing is as perfect, you just wanted to find a guy and marry, i was so sure i'm going to live up to remain in my DSC. but as time passes and as our life experiences build up, we seem to change our minds
dictionary.com defines love as an intense feeling of deep affection, i will just summarize it as meeting the right person at the right time. such a simple statement, so hard to be true in real life.
let us just sing our hearts out later and drink our guts out on ladies nite...

with the coming of 4.30pm of poster day on friday, it was finally finally done with my final year project! phew! what a relief.
i think if there's a nomination and prize, i vote myself for the most relaxed, most heck-care student. i walked into the lobby with only one aim in mind, that is the end of the day. i had to admit i was a bit shocked to see my classmates holding cards of prepared speech and rehearsing because i had nothing! all i did for preparation was trying to look presentable. well, it went quite alright, i think i had 2 examiners though both came empty-handed and looked as if they were just window shopping for posters.
oh well, the photos...


and here's photo from ahchoo's fish n co dinner


and it's finally holiday! when everyone else is starting school. heh.
from now till august ends, i'll be doing my packing, meeting up with people, basically enjoy life while i can..

life's much more relaxed after the submission of my fyp thesis. caught a few movies these few days, both in cinemas and on my laptop. though i'm not a very good movie critic, here's my comments: the mummy 3 wasn't that exciting and i really think that actors should just speak the language they are familiar with and let the subtitles do their job. money no enough 2 was quite a typical jackneo show pretty funny and touching at parts though i would prefer them to mention 'government' less and less national day songs in their anti-propaganda motives, just a personal opinion. the alzheimic ah-ma was damn funny and makes me wonder how my grandma will be when i go visit her next year, wonder if she will still recognize me even. and i am not going to watch this kind of show early in the morning in a heartland mall again. it felt like an old folk's home cos the whole cinema only had old people who were happily munching away and talking in the last row. but then again who else will be so free on a monday morning when school has already started..
tuesday went for trng after such a long sedentary life after ncc and the next day i was aching all over. even my abs hurt a bit. just goes to show how long i've not exercised. time to get moving again before my arteries get clogged up.
yesterday was probably the most productive and fruitful day. spent the morning at home watching '21', very good show indeed. then went to print poster and shop for clothes for friday's poster day, before taking the very long bus ride to jp for ahchoos gathering, almost 2 hours! luckily there were seats. our food finally came at around 945 after all the waiting. 120% attendance from ahchoos!! wow i want the photos!!
now i'm just looking forward to the end of poster day and the rooftop party!

finally it's almost over. although i must admit my thesis is definitely not the best that i can write, nor does it deserve an 'A' for the amount of work and effort i put in, i am glad that i finally handed it in, like a big burden off my shoulder. for now, it's just doing the poster, which is probably just a lot of cut and paste, and preparing for the presentation, which is mainly finding something decent to wear. after that, everything will be over and it's finally holiday!! listening to most of my coursemates complain about how they have never seen daylight and have not been sleeping much for months make me wonder why was i having such a relaxing time? i usually leave lab before the evening peak hour and haven't been sleeping much because i was out enjoying myself. if my examiner sees this, he'll probably just give me a 'D', which i deserve.
had a meeting with our dean after submitting the thesis to discover the horrible facts about bj that there's probably no internet in dorm, no blogspot lj, morning buses that pick us up at 7am from the dorm and leaves the hospital at 5.30pm (what am i suppose to do at night then?) and our only vacation next year has been cut from 6 weeks to 5 weeks!! right, what can i do? nothing!
you tell me one month is a long time, i say one month is very short. i knew where i was a month ago, and i know where i will be in a month's time. we can't turn back clock and undo what's done, neither can we predict the future, so just let me live in the present and welcome each day as it comes.

i've only submitted my first and final draft for fyp and i'm already in the holiday mood! i know there's still lots more to correct, a poster to do and so i brought myself to school early today hoping to get back my draft early, start working on it and be done early so that there's time to party tonight. sigh, i guess that's my only motivation to work on it now.
this morning at 2am, instead of re-looking at my thesis, i sat in front of my screen, surfing the net, chatting with people and sipping my cocktail and thinking about things. for a person who just want to immerse herself in that moment of happiness and doesn't think far ahead, i don't think i have the best answer to all these unresolved issues. but i still believe life's a choice, and i chose it to be this way. when it comes to making a decision. i choose to escape.
a month away from my departure, i used to look forward to that day where i can walk through the departure gate, wave goodbye to my family and friends, start a new segment of my life in a foreign land. no more naggings from parents, no more unhappy memories. but now i'm not so sure. maybe that will be the day when my heart which is made of ice can melt and i can shed a tear for everything and everybody i can't take along with me.
perhaps i'm pessimistic, perhaps i'm fickle, or maybe i'm just being realistic in that i don't want to make a promise i can't keep, a commitment i can't abide to, a feeling i can't guarantee it won't change. i know, i'm just escaping, because i'm afraid..
perahps someone should teach me what is true love, what is commitment, and teach me how to cry..

i am not going back lab in the middle of the night again. it's freaking me out and literally giving me nightmares!
the past few days have been spent trying my best to write my thesis which is due next week, and helping out at Sports Camp. Just less than half an hour ago, as i decided to take a power nap, i actually dreamt that i was in lab and there seemed to be nobody else around, as i walked past the cleaning auntie and into the toilet, my vision was unusually blurred. one cubicle was occupied so i went into an empty one, as i slowly shut my eye bags and opened again, i saw a gun, or rather a rifle just beside me!!
freaky!!

yesterday was probably really my last race. think i recall saying that many times since many years ago, but seems like there's something tempting me to row every race. perhaps it's this desire for challenge and the affection for the water that lead me into one race after another.
yesterday's 10km was pretty good, for someone like me who hasn't been training. the queen of last-minuteness rowed two 10k during the last 2 saturdays and have been running for the past 2 weeks only. think i survived by riding wash half of the time. oops. lining up at the startline already made me feel old, i don't know 90percent of my competitors and they all look so young! think it's really time to bring home my paddle, frame it up or hang it up for display.
post comp dinner was at bugis steamboat. headed straight to bugis from mac and reached there super early. instead of heading for bugis junction or bugis street for shopping, i walked straight to nat lib, sat outside at hans to enjoy the breeze and played with my itouch while listening to music. was totally not in the mood to shop and the thought of having to squeeze through the crowd simply puts me off. it was not really a team dinner because the attendance was minimal. more like a mala challenge, with my added ma and la pot it was indeed powerful! the soup was more like chilli oil with lots of pepperlike spices. lips were swollen like sausage and sweating profusely. but it was shiok! sat down for talk cock and dessert after that till the rain stopped..

SU15 is starting soon, was once a freshie, once a freshie programmer, a senior prog and now a retired prog. last week on my way to school, i saw groups of freshies sitting around in circles at the interchange, with sleeping bags etc all ready for foc. i can't imagine i was once like that, cheering my hearts and lungs out in public, running and jumping around for one whole week with minimal sleep. i must admit it was a great kick start to uni life, and it was unforgettable, but i can't picture myself doing that again now..

jia you SU15!!!

just came back from a half-day escape to JB of food, movie and just walking around. seems like everytime we go, it always starts and ends with secret recipe. who can resist the thick slice of damn yummilicious and sinful cake?
caught 'the dark knight' there also, quite surprising that the cinema is less than half full, and that's my 4th movie in 3 days and i've watched almost every movie that is showing in cinema now. it's a very long show and halfway through the show i thought it was ending already when there was still one more hour to go. the cinema was freezing cold and the sound system was very very bad. and i even almost fell asleep towards the end of the show. ok la, other than the lousy environment, the movie itself was not bad, worth watching for the action and the effects.
why do i have to be reminded that it's 2 weeks of fyp left, one and a half month in sg left?

today is literally a sun-day! and it was my first time at a triathlon. i didn't go as a participant, but as a volunteer. the day started early and i actually managed to get myself to ecp in 40min with only $7.80 spent on cab. i was basically in a canoe around the swimming route to look after the safety and keep the swimmers on track. quite an easy job, but the current was very strong and i had to keep moving up and down to keep myself in position. really admire all the swimmers, i think i would just cling on to the barrier and drag myself around it.
today's weather was madness la. spent a total of 5 hours under the sun, with no sunblock applied because i wanted to test out the effects of my newly purchased drug. it's impossible not to get burnt, but not too bad i would say. and just as all the participants finished their swim and we carried the boats and stuff up to shore, the passing cloud stopped right above us and it poured!! what a change from the killer sun, but i like neither. ok, i really think i am meant to just sit at home and nua.
oh and i realised today's the 2 and a half years anniversary of my driving licence! to think that i even wanted to put the p plate so that ppl won't horn at me.
yawn.. time to sleep..

早知道伤心总是难免的 你又何苦一往情深
因为爱情总是难舍难分 何必在意那一点点温存
要知道伤心总是难免的 在每一个梦醒时分
有些事情你现在不必问 有些人你永远不必等

what an oldie, i know, but oldies are easy to sing, nice to hear and so true..
and i have convinced myself that my driving skills is not that bad afterall, and it's so much more convenient, but petrol is damn expensive la! ok, enough said, no more car till i don't know when.
oh well, shall attempt writing my thesis since i've got nothing to do now..

hello july, and that means one more month of fyp, 2 more months here. people are already starting to ask if i've packed and got ready for bj, while in actual fact many things are not finalised and confirmed, needless to say packing. what packing? haha
finally got down to paddling yesterday. only 10km mileage and it was tiring!! stability still there but fitness and strength definitely cannot make it already. clear signs that i should retire.
so many things to do, so little time. let me indulge in this moment of happiness and wake me up when august ends..

today's probably the busiest and most productive day for fyp, rather fruitful as well. finally got down to doing the proper experiments of feeding and testing my little mice. they weigh only about 10g on average! felt a tinge of sadness and sympathy seeing them so helplessly running around, and heard the pain in their cries as we clip their toes and tails. felt so sorry for them.
at the end of it, it's the thing called feelings that makes everything the way they are. always been wondering do people change or do feelings change, or both.
some things can never be the same again no matter how we try to ignore and hide away from them, i know i've changed, for the better or for the worse i do not know. i used to be so good at hiding secrets, so good at lying through my teeth without feeling a sense of guilt. i can't do so anymore. if there's anything that hasn't changed, it's the way i lie to myself. perhaps i should just take things simple, learn to laugh, learn to love, learn to experience the happiness of zeng jing yong you.
last dragon boat race tmr..
meanwhile trying to familiarize myself with my new macbook. pure prettyness!

because i was bored...

You Are Most Like Carrie!

You're quirky, flirty, and every guy's perfect first date. But can the guy in question live up to your romantic ideal? It's tough for you to find the right match - you're more than a little picky. Never fear... You've got a great group of friends and a great closet of clothes, no matter what! Romantic prediction: You'll fall for someone this year... Totally different from any guy you've dated.

Which Sex and the City Vixen Are You?

The Part of You That No One Sees

You are passionate, romantic, and emotional. You put love first in your life, even though you have often been disappointed by it. You expect to be swept of your feet, and you never expect infatuation to die out. Underneath it all, you are scared that you aren't lovable. Your insecurity has ruined many relationships, as you are unable to see the love that's really there. You are secretly afraid of being alone. Confronting your insecurities is incredibly painful.

What's the Part of You That No One Sees?

hmmmm true to a certain extent

this is pretty outdated considering that today's already thurs, but yeah, spent last saturday afternoon at sentosa with over 400 other bikini-clad girls for the record breaking photoshoot. we just sat on the sand, or rather lied down on the sand because there weren't enough people i guess, in the formation of 'CLEO', with those elegible bachelors serving us water and sunblock, and some girls beside me were touching up on their makeup while i was already melting in the hot sun! ok, this was the most bimbo thing i've done so far, but i have to admit, it's pretty fun and so simple.

lulu and i



part of the letter 'O'



happy with our free goodie bag after the whole thing.



and our free tuky-tuky!!

batam

last friday,i escaped from lab, took my passport and took a 1hour long ferry ride to batam. the whole journey started with a bang, thanks to someone who was 40 minutes late and we had to run into the boat just minutes before the departure time when they were announcing our names over the PA system. so embarassing la!!

that's stewed and i on the ferry there, the girl who almost got all of us to miss the ferry!! lousy!! haha
upon reaching, our first stop was none other than breakfast to fill our starving tummies. due to the time difference, it was only around 8am batam time when we reached.
next was the highlight of the trip - go kart. we took a rather long walk there in the early morning sun, quite a nice stroll though, and every taxi that drove past us stopped to ask if we need a cab. not surprising. finally walked past the cable-ski park and reached the go-kart circuit. it looked quite rundown with no water supply in the toilets. 18 bucks for 10 mins. very expensive indeed, but since we were already there just go for it. the circuit was quite uneven and bumpy and why must they discriminate against people with short legs?? i had to tip toe to push the accelerator all the way in la! and i can self declare myself being the safest driver! no stunts, just trying my best to avoid all the puddles of water so as not to get dirty.


after that, we took the most expensive cab ride for the day to nagoya. it's a small town with shopping and food. it was still early for lunch but who can resisit this:

oooohhh so yummy!!!

upsized rootbeer float!!!



we walked around the shopping centre before deciding to split half, 3 of us went to walk incredible hulk, while the other 3 went for massage. the movie tickets were super cheap!! 15,000 rupiah, which equates to less the SGD 2.50!! and the cinema is comparable to those here. did a bit of shopping after that before heading for lunch, or was is tea or dinner? whichever.

that's where we went for seafood, i felt sorry for the cab driver who took us there for SGD6, that equates to 1 buck per person because the 6 of us squeezed into 1 cab.
we ordered a steamd fish, cereal prawn, black pepper crab, sotong, chicken, kangkong, toufu and fried rice, not forgetting the freeflow of white rice. we sure were hungry to finish up every bit of it.

that's only part of the food, fish and chicken were missing.



with stomachs full, it was time to head back. took the same cab to batam centre and got the tickets for 1830 back to Singapore. seems like we have not learnt our lesson to board the ferry early. we went shopping again at the megamall there and had to run back to the terminal and ran up to the ferry!
yup, that's the end of our batam slacking trip!

yummy donuts from jco, and definitely much cheaper than singapore.

erm don't ask me what's up with them. they just had to be funny.

a busy week has just passed, busy in the fun way that is. for those who are interested in my life, here's a brief summary of it. monday to wednesday was purely fyp and work. thurs night went wala wala and almost deafened by the music. friday was spent at batam with my 6e classmates, just chilling around. saturday was busy rushing from one place to another, gym in the morning, sentosa in the afternoon and work at night. and today, work, db trng and then went out for dinner. i foresee a very busy week ahead again. now that my mice have grown up and i can finally start on my project proper, my prof is going for a one month holiday! and i don't have any mentors or seniors doing similar projects. i'm horrified! faints!
and this is probably the most i've exercised in a week so far. swam, ran, gymmed, rowed. i know its nothing compared to the last-time me, but it's a lot for the superlazy me now. oh man, just hope i can move and get out of bed tomorrow morning.

and i must say this, though it may sound too mushy and gives you goosebumps. I LOVE MY DAD TO BITS!!!! after whining that he's got no father's day gift from me, cos he wasn't in s'pore last weekend, he came back from the states with a new macbook, itouch and ipod shuffle!! love the mac and touch. soooooo pretty!!!! and obviously he is aware that his daughter is a computer idiot that he told me not to use the mac first until he asks the experts to set it up for me. alright, even better value-added service. and i'm selling the shuffle, 1GB, silver in colour, brand new and unopened. anyone interested before i put it up for auction? well, it was a door gift from the conference i guess and i already have one. very good for running.

ok, i think i'm so blessed, and i can declare myself as the world's bmm! haha.

guess it's time to hit the pillow and rest my old bones, will update my happening week with photos when i do have time..

天上的眼泪
他好像懂我的心碎
懂得轻轻给我一些安慰
我们应该要了解
伤了心有种爱的美
天上的彩虹
总出现在天晴雨过
我已经懂得轻轻的放手
就算我觉得难过
你会在我身边守候
陪我一起去看彩虹

the meaning of suay is when i finally decided to go for a swim this morning, even brought my sun tanning oil, and the sky suddenly decided to turn dark and in less than half an hour, lightning and thunder striked.
the meaning of suaku is that i didn't know that citylink and suntec is now linked by an underpass which has been there for a few months already. looks like i've done a good job hiding at home.
wanted to buy the oral sunblock yesterday, but freaking expensive la!!
looks like i've to get my mac from s'pore already. don't be tricked by their 'ship within 24hrs', the actual 'delivery' to your doorstep is a few more days later! pui!

seems like my intention of getting a tan has brought the rain instead,
是否太晚路已走远
我的眼眶泪太满
走不回你身边
你能体谅我有雨天
偶尔胆怯你都了解
过去那些大雨落下的瞬间
我突然发现
谁能体谅我的雨天
此刻脚步会慢一些
如此坚决
你却越来越远

this may just have been the busiest weekend so far, running around the island occupied with different activities. the major event was seniors camp, which i went for about half of the events. being a wondering ghost is fun, except for the heat in the stuffy room in my ghostly outfit and no toilet in the whole area! and i am white enough to save the trouble of powdering my face, how about that.. but that may just be the end of my white-ness, hours under the midday sun yesterday was enough to leave my skin red and prickly, especially the shoulders, and after 2 weekends of db to come, i think i will be back to my original colour soon.
and how can i forget sbs research lab's happy hour on friday? this time it was organised by my lab. beer, chips, nuts, icecream, chocolate, fruits etc. etc. no prize for guessing, i was just there for the food and drinks.


brewerkz golden ale!!! good stuff!!

wanted to check out the gadgets at the pc show on sat morning but wth, they only open at 12pm!! so no choice had to go in the evening, and as expected, the horrible crowd!! almost impossible to walk without being blocked by ppl. faints.. best thing is i didn't buy anything at all from there. most prob asking my dad to help me get from the US. father's day = father buy me a new lappie?? hahaha when it comes to this type of things, i admit i'm superficial. i will just choose the prettiest-looking one =)
finally in lab again, and mom had to wake me up twice this morning, and for both times i asked her what day it was today and took at least a minute or two to register. i think i left my mind at camp still.

是唱出了心中的感慨，让音乐弥漫这空间？还是只是借助歌曲来表达不曾也不敢说出的心情，填补心中的空虚？
the reality of the unspoken truth, the simplicity in such complexity.
或许大家都在寻找一个答案，还是只是逃避现实？

c'est la vie

at this rate, i think i can finish watching my collections of movies in lab! just some photos of my babies..

at birth

one week old.
so now i'll just waiting for them to grow up before carrying out experiments on them.
just finished watching the final episode of healing hands 3 online cos i missed it yesterday on tv, and now entertaining myself with songs. and not forgetting kept wide awake with coffee to keep myself awake during this morning's lab meeting.
yesterday was the first time opening the lab door in the early morning because we didn't know the usual monday lab meeting was postponed to today. prof was on leave and when the cat's away, the mice come out to play! watched movie and disappeared after lunch for some singing! kbox's student promo is really quite worth it, considering the free flow of soft drinks and freshly fried tapas. who cares about the oil. however, amidst all the school children on holiday, i really feel old. and i guess the staff were too busy entertaining those little kids to chase us away, if not we would have had dinner at aston! well, there's always another day! walked around the pasar malam after that before heading back to school just to sit in for gm for fun.

last night felt as if time was tuned back to a few years ago, when we were a good young age of 18, in the good old mt sinai campus. those beautiful memories, and those silly things that we did, and not forgetting the gossips that we never knew!! yeah, those were the days!
and yesterday i dug out some of my message histories to read. oh well, people do change, and we have all grown up and matured..
and ouch, my lower body is aching so badly from my 2-hour gym workout yesterday. super unfit and flabby now!!

i am now officially the grandma of 4 baby mice, co-grandma of 2 and step-grandma of 7. grow up babies, quick grow up so that i can proceed with my fyp!!
spent the whole morning attempting to make changes to this blog, but can't find any very nice skins to change, and still have no idea why all the words are in white, and i absolutely don' know how to enable adding of comments!! argh forget it then.
not everyday is friday but today, for those who do read this, anyone wants, or knows of anyone who want monthly disposable contacts, power -4.5 and -5.0?? yes free one whole box before they expire..
yawn, tired, let ignorance accompany me into my dreams..

perhaps after so long we have not established the thing called trust. you never fail to amuse me, or shall i say disappoint me this time round, and welcome me to your world of stubborn-ness. pardon me if what i write is too vague, or cheem, or hard to understand, it's probably just the way things are. two extremes may just be separated by a faint line or border.
this is totally random and created out of boredom:

走在布满落叶的道路，看不清前方的方向。
回头看看踩过的过往，
是金色的回忆还是枯黄的创伤？

你说那是大树的眼泪，我说那是道路的衣裳。
还是他所谓老天的玩笑，
让这大自然也变得如此荒唐。

只有在半睡半醒中才得到这样的释放，
原有的枫叶只是隐藏
那说不出又猜不透美丽的谎。

风徐徐地吹过那流过泪的脸庞，
吹醒了宁睡的心
以及那不符合实际的希望。

天上没有天使，地上也没有帝王，
人间没有爱神，
更没有美丽的童话歌谣在歌唱。

请不要再让我陷入那深奥的漩涡，请让我的无知换来这短暂的幸福。

my daily routine now can be just simplified as school, work, sleep. ok, i shouldn't be complaining because at least i'm keeping myself occupied and earning money, though it's damn damn boring. and i really shouldn't be complaining since i'm quite enjoying my life now, especially the crazy things i've done these few days. food hunts through the night, board games cos we're bored, and finally ktv and even pool for someone who has totally no ball sense!
FYP is progressing slowly, now that we're done with brewing herbs, most of my time is spent in the lab office reading and writing. and occasionally going down to visit my mice. i have 2 wildtype pups now!!
i didn't know i'm so good at summarizing, or should i say i'm just lazy to blog

long weekend's over and it's back to school, back to the lab tmr. although it's only been a week and although it's otot, the thought of going to sch everyday is kind of sian. yeah, that's the perfect word for it.
just found out today that round ubin is in june, which clashes with seniors camp!! seriously for the past 3 years no matter when is it, it will clash with something. a bit tempted to row but i haven't been exercising at all! and by right i can't touch water for another 2 weeks.
for general health purposes, i think i should start exercising and get A BIT of sun again. believe it or not but the last time i gymmed was before MR, the last time i rowed was more than 2 weeks ago. and on the average i run once a week now. that's all.

why are there still so many people in school when it's holidays now? and the morning traffic has not changed a bit. luckily i'm quite free and easy, can come and go anytime i want. brought my lappie today for research and to keep me company in lab, and here i am, waiting for time to pass.
went down to the animal house for the first time yesterday to take a look. it was quite smelly and ppl working there have to be covered from head to toe - cap, mask, gown, gloves, socks. (so environmental unfriendly right?) mice to researchers is just like any other specimen or reagents, what do you do to the excess? throw it away. what do you do to the unwanted mice? pick them up by their tail, put them in a yellow plastic bag, write and sign a termination form, into the gas chamber they go, the chamber closes, co2 is turned on, they struggle and tried to jump out for a few seconds before collapsing and lie motionless. off to the biohazard bin they go eventually..
went down again today, got a cage of mice for myself and today is day 1 of their mating. now i'm just waiting for my mutant baby mice to arrive...

Yesterday was my second time walking into an operating theatre. (The first time was about 8 years ago when in actual fact I limped in and out of the OT to excavate an ingrown toenail.) This time was for lasik.

Booked the appointment last week and decided to conduct the evaluation and the surgery on the same day to save trouble. As with all operations, no lotions, creams, makeups, perfumes whatsoever was allowed. pretty easy on the getting ready to get out of house part, but i felt so 'naked' walking around in town. (when was the last time you went out to town from home with nothing on your face or hair?)
Reached there pretty early for the evaluation, which lasted more than 2 hours. this is how it went briefly. First, I was asked to fill up my particulars and then waited to be called into the examination area, where a series of eye-power, eye-pressure and cornea tests were done. Eye power test was easy and quite standard. Eye-pressure test was 'shocking' in that a sudden gust of air was shot out into the eye multiple times, i couldn't help but jump at each shot, but luckily it was fast. the cornea test was quite tiresome. it's basically a test to measure the thickness of cornea and hence deduce the suitability for lasik. i don't know if it's the problem of my eyes or is it quite standard for everyone, but it was a long process of "blink, blink, blink followed by open your eyes as big as possible and don't blink for 5 counts". the optimetrist even asked me to rest my eyes before continueing. alright, maybe my eyes are really quite small. after that, some eyedrops were instilled to dilate the pupils and a video on lasik was shown. it was then followed by the last round of tests to confirm the previous results after dilation, before a counseling session was given on the procedure, risks, post-surgery care etc. Lastly, I got the see my surgeon, who recommended me to do the intralase standard, which uses laser to cut the cornea flap instead of the normal blade, because my cornea is slightly on the thin side. Of course, it's slightly more expensive but I decided to follow his recommendation since this wasn't the time to get 'suntie' and go for the cheapest possible. The whole procedure, inclusive of waiting time lasted until about 12 noon when i made my payment and went for lunch and some aimless walking for 2 hours before washing my face and heading back to the clinic for surgery.
Upon reaching the clinic again, I was given a final eye-check on my pupils before going into the resting area right outside the operation theatre. there, i was asked to sign the agreement and escorted to my own little cubicle while waiting for my turn. the nurses helped me wear the surgery gown, shoes and cap, and explained to me how to use the eyedrops after the surgery. I must say they are really friendly, polite, young and pretty! Very soon, it was my turn.
The surgeon greeted me and I was asked to lie on the bed. After that, my head was secured by 2 barriers at the side and the nurse instilled some anesthetic eyedrops. I was then pushed under the 'cornea-slicing machine' and the doctor placed a round circular plastic thing in just the right shape to cup my eyeball. It wasn't painful, but rather quite uncomfortable, as though someone is pressing against your eyeball. it momentarily blinded my vision and i heard the doc reciting some numbers and directions and i guess he's looking at the screen when the flap was created on my cornea. The same was done with the left eye.
That was stage 1. Following that, I was pushed and placed under the other machine, which does the actual lasering. The nurse pasted a huge sticker across my face, with a hole in the centre exposing only my right eye. and i felt the doctor pasting 2 more tapes on my upper and lower eyelids respectively, then using some kind of metal tool that keeps my eye opened. I was then instructed to look straight up into the red light while he carefully flipped open the flap and did the lasering. the laser process only lasted for half a minute. I could hear the "tac-tac-tac" of the machine and smell a burning rubber smell. It didn't feel as bad as the first stage, and my sense of sight wasn't removed. When that was done, the doctor put back the flap, smoothened out any possible bubbles and placed a protective contact lens over it. Then came the most painful part - the tearing off of the sticker! I think they helped me with facial hair removal too! haha
The whole process was finished within about 15 minutes, after which my vision was still blur but i managed to walk out of the OT back into my resting area. I sat there for about half an hour, closed my eyes to rest, listened to what the nurse has to say as she helped me out of my OT attire, placed eye shields over my eyes and waited for her to book my appointment for the first review the next day.
Then i was done! That's how simple it is.
I think i must have looked like an alien as i walk to the taxi stand and waited for cab. The cute and pretty nurse was nice enough to send me into the cab.
being an obedient patient, i tried to sleep right after i got back, but it was quite impossible to at 4pm when i had 10 hours of sleep the previous day, and so i took one of the three sleeping pills prescibed and had a good rest till dinner. and having nothing better to do, i went back to sleep at 10 and was wide awake before 4am! i never knew time passes so slowly when i lie on my bed doing nothing. It's definitely not insomnia, it's the symptom of having had 'too much sleep'.

Went back for my first review today and the doctor took out the protective contacts. yay, i'm done! although my eyes are still a bit red and i've to use those lubricating eyedrops every 2 hours and constantly remind myself not to touch my eyes, everything feels and looks good. can't wait to wash my hair and face tomorrow since i'm not allowed to wash them for 48 hours in case of infection from the water. and no water sports for a month, in other words, no trainings!

Yes, I know I should be busy hiding in the lab doing FYP or at least searching for a huge pile of research material to read up on, but i'm doing nothing! Let me just enjoy the last few days of my holiday...

yawn...
the piggie slept from 9pm to 7am last night. the piggie just woke up from afternoon nap, had dinner and thinks it should go back to sleep again. vision's still a bit blurry and eyelids feel heavy and i shouldn't even been looking at the comp screen..
shall update when i'm awake again...
goodnight

tell me how different i am from a pig when majority of my time is spent eating and sleeping, and the cycle repeats. on a typical day i take morning and afternoon naps, and satisfied my ice-cream cravings with 3 big cones on b&j free cone day! ok, i know, at least i read newspapers, watches tv and movies, goes out to shop, and i don't roll around in mud. that's about it.
let me be the pig before i don't get a chance to. and wth the school's system is damn screwed up, now i am suppose to cut myself into 2 and do 2 fyps???
and oh yes, i never learnt my lesson. will i ever?

finally had a break from sleeping one hour a day on the table, locking myself up in the puny study room, door closed, curtains drawn, no clock, no internet etc for 2 consecutive days. sounds like hell doesn't it? and my 'reward'? going into the freezing exam hall, finding 5 answer booklets on the table so that we can use 1 booklet for 1 question, and i'm quite sure the total amount i wrote wasn't even enough to fill up one booklet. didn't we just celebrate earth day not too long ago? obviously doctors don't really care for the environment, and not to say for the student brain. (if i had any to start with).
oh well, it still feels good to be one of the first to finish exams. and looks like my prof is quite nice (or rather slack) to give me 2 weeks of rest before going back to the labs again..
so for the past few days, i've finally paid orchard road a visit, had nothing better to do so went grocery and household shopping with mum, caught a movie and had a good laugh, started on tidying up the files in my lappie, and work so as to gain back the financial lost incurred.
meanwhile i really think i should start exercising again soon...

yayness to wireless to keep me company and being my fastest, though not the most trustworthy dictionary!! i still don't know what network i'm connected to, it says 'default', err.. so i guess i'm not koping anybody's right?
the computer idiot here has just discovered that the screen resolution can actually be changed so that everything would look normal instead of stretched. yes, after almost 3 long years of owning this lappie, and suddenly everything looks so much sharper and more proportionate. everybody in all photos looks so much taller and thinner now.
hahaha, i'm been entertained by my stupidity again...

1 paper down and 2 more to go. quite touched that my mom even called me yesterday morning to make sure i woke up for my paper. and i just proved my inability to read the professor's mind (in spotting questions) and to read instructions. well, i did read the instruction eventually, but it was only when time was up and after i closed the answer booklet and circled the question numbers on the cover page. and so it read "answer one(1) of the three questions", and i did 2. don't ask me why. i was stunned for a few seconds, read it a few more times and took out my pencil to draw a big cross over the last question.
i am once again so amused by myself.
had lunch at the new foodcourt in school and checked out the new sakae outlet. pretty cool and unique, if only they had student price, it'll be even better. i will miss the old canteen for their cheap drinks, fruits, sandwiches, paus etc...
last night i was so determined to go running this morning, cos the only exercise i've done for the past week was walking to westmall cos i missed the shuttle bus. and guess what, there was a thunderstorm early this morning! looks like even the weather is helping me turn white and pasty. haha.
feels good to have home cooked food in my stomach now and the other reason why i'm back is because i don't even have internet connection in my room now!! looks like my parents are either forcing me to study, or forcing me to move back. just one more week, before i can spend my entire day nua-ing at home. it will be time to ask tv back into my life. haha