oh my gawd i am a total disgrace to the existance of mankind! I got a shock of my life when i saw reflection in the mirror after my German paper. with eye bags so big due to the lack of sleep, and the double chin, those love handles, 'bye-bye' arms, thunder-wobbly thighs, fat ass, due to all the rubbish i've been ingesting, like one jar of nutella in 2 days(?!?!?!) and the super blemished skin, thinning hair, plus the oversized t-shirt and folded jeans, basically nothing pleasant to look at... yes, i'm ugly!! it's really time to do something about it.
alright, today marked the end of uni year 2 with the most stressful paper ever. but instead of walking out of the exam hall with joy, knowing that the worse is over, i felt more lost than anything, not knowing what to do for the rest of the day, the holidays, and just kept wondering is everything worth it? all the time spent mugging, the tears and blood shed, the damage done to my body with all the nights, the binging in comfort food, the dependence on caffeine, which seem to have lost its effect, the mess in my room, and the neck-ache cos i have been sleeping in the chair. and i do hope my mom won't get a shock when the electric bill comes. yes, all these for just 2 and a half hours and my mind never fail to go blank when i stare at the paper, and with my ability to spot the wrong questions and what's more MY BLARDY PHONE ALARM WENT OFF IN THE MIDDLE OF THE PAPER EVEN THOUGH MY PHONE WAS SWTCHED OFF!!! yes, WTF!!!!!!!! beware when you put your alarm as 'ring everyday' and 'auto power' on your ss phone.
yes i should just be expelled from school, sometimes i really wonder if i regret taking this course, now that the course is getting so popular that interviews are conducted, my 2 cents worth of advice is, really, think carefully. 5 years of your youth put under extreme levels of stress, with a lifetime of uncertainty after you graduate. if i were given a choice... i want to start with year 1 again, cos i think i've wasted 2 years, ending up with miserable results that may even have a problem getting me a job next time.
alright, can someone pull me out of the state of depression.......
it's time to get back to normal life. sleep and eat properly!!