gosh... i love safra gym!!!!! it's so nice and roomy and they even provide free locker and towel. and i think i chose a right time to go, it was rather empty and i was the only girl there. the machines were strange and different from clubfitt gyms but the trainer was so friendly and helpful. spent a fruitful 2 hours there, worked out at almost every machine to burn some calories and make me feel less guilty after all the mooncake eating. shall make full use of the 2 more free trials at safra gym. it shall be ranked number 1 together with kallang gym.
i'm so glad i didn't study much for econs s. the paper was quite expected, nothing surprising and i had quite a lot of fun crapping, hope i didn't misquote any economists. yes, it's finally the end of prelims...
and i'm in love with fir's songs and addicted to running..

yay.. huilin we love you and we're so proud of you!! haha.. think we made a complete fool of ourselves at the airport yesterday "waving" our last-minute-made "banner" out of foolscap paper as huilin departed for philippines. all the way, girl! bring back those medals.
went to meet my darling van for shopping after that, monday seemed like a nice day to shop, but being the only patrons in the shop, the salesgirl was bugging me to try on more clothes and pleading for me to buy. scary.. combed the whole of far east, didn't buy much then walked to taka for more shopping and mooncake sampling. tried almost all the different flavoured mooncakes and shared 2 boxes cos it was buy one get one free. now my house is loaded with mooncakes and my mom is going to stuff mooncakes down my throat today cos it's mid autumn. right, it's time of the year to get fat and i'm already quite sick of it after the sampling.
thanks dear for the present, it's very pretty and sweet.. don't know if i'll see you before your birthday to pass you yours, which is only half existent at the present moment, haha.
what should i be doing now? studying for econs s? nah.. forget it..

yep, we did it, a good long 21 km, feeling so proud of myself now. started a few minutes late cos there was a long queue at the baggage deposit and toilets but not like we're competing against anyone. it was a rare experience to be on my feet and running up and down sheares bridge at 6 am in the morning though that's the usual time i run. then running along east coast park, just in time to witness the rising of the sun. then we turned to the roads, pass national stadium and ended with our familiar route back to the esplanade. yes, my knees almost died and the last few km seems much longer than expected, but we did it. thank you so much shine!!!! and we'll train for the full marathon which is twice of this, can't imagine myself doing that. hopefully i can still walk tomorrow, i still need my legs for shopping...
there may be no limit as to how much i can run but don't test my limits on other things. oh well, forget it!!
and yes, all the best to the singapore canoeists, especially huilin, you guys are damn zai and jia you in the philippines....

i'm back, from prelims. in a summary, maths was ok, except that i know i'll make lots of careless mistakes, especially for paper 1 cos i didn't really check through, quite risky for someone who can even press her calculator wrongly. chemistry was hard, as expected, but i think physics is worse, maybe it just goes to show my lack of physics brain cells, econs case study was a crap, what i wrote didn't even make sense to me and i can't imagine myself sitting in the hall again next week for 3 more hours of econs crapping.
at least i had a good break yesterday, 5 whole hours of singing and of course i'm not complaining. finally, i'm 18 haha thank you so much for all those people who remembered my birthday despite the fact that it was during prelims, i'm so touched. i feel older now, legal to do so many things but it also means i have to pay adult rate for gym and swimming pool.
looking forward to: my first half marathon

tomorrow will mark the start of prelims. time flies... sigh am i prepared for prelims? no. so much information to squeeze into my puny brain in such a short time and i foresee tuesday will be a killer. chem department is all out to kill, even ms lee says don't expect too much for chem prelims cos it's going to be hard and study hard for As. oh well...

haven't been blogging for a long, long time, my life now is so boring that there is nothing to blog about unless i want to complain about prelims and how there's not much time left to mug. sigh.. i guess that's what j2 life is all about, i'm not complaining because its of no use. just face it and move on.
i'm looking forward to after 'A's, it's always good to plan ahead so you'll have something to look forward to, malacca trip, half and full marathon which i have no idea if i can last through, and the possible back-packing trip. not forgetting all the freedom and time i have to shop, play, and do everything that i want. life will be great. so let me get through this first...

in the midst of doing my personal write up for mr teo.. and making me wonder how much exactly do i know about myself. sometimes somethings that i do just cannot be explained logically and the best explanation would be "because i feel like doing it". went for scholarship day on saturday and camped in lt1 the whole morning. the scholarship that A-star provides and the career options it offers are damn cool, but i seriously doubt i'll get anywhere near the scholarship with my mediocre grades and the number of people who are better than me. but at least i know where my interest lies. just came from trials in the morning, i feel really off-form now, from all the slacking and rubbish weights and exercises that i've been doing since nationals are over. south east asia canoeing championships this coming september and october.. sounds tempting but it's time to know where my priorities lie. yes, A levels. although canoeing means a lot to me and even if i'm selected for it, i don't think it's logical to sacrifice As for this, especially if both turn out to be a disaster.
the next thing that might turn out to be a disaster: dinner tonight, cooked by me. keep your fingers crossed haha

at 12 noon, when the doors just opened, a crowd of people swarmed their way in, fighting to be the first, to be in front of everyone else. i watched the scene with astonishment and shock. it wasn't any great singapore sale, nor was it any free gifts up for grabs, it was the library. oh my gosh, i can't believe this. who says singapore lacks muggers, too much maybe. call it kiasuism, or lack of conducive environment, but the sight was simply unbelievable and to think that library's a good place for mugging? i won't really agree especially with the freezing air-con, noisy students who simply cannot abide to the rules of library, lack of tables or maybe just a plethora of muggers and table-hoggers. oh well.. but having a sister who can't stop singing nursery rhymes and jumping around the house is not any better, but at least i won't be a big bright light bulb. haha

and listen to this: everything that has a beginning has an end.

sigh, i'm so undecided about my future, where which university i'm going, what i'm going to study etc.. seems like every university has it's own plus points and it's so hard for me to decide especially since i haven't decided on the course, but i'm definitely not going to study an arts subject since i suck at it. but who knows what will happen. everybody's talking about universities now and it just feels strange that everybody's going to go separate paths after leaving jc, it's like now we're all attending the same lectures, studying the same things but next year everybody's going everywhere, studying different things. and how about 10 years down the road? will we meet up again? if we do then we'll have representatives of almost all kinds of jobs, politicians, economists, scientists, engineers, lawyers, mathematicians, businessmen, doctors, and the list goes on...

people say begin with an end in mind, because everything that has a beginning has an end.
friday marked the end of canoeing for us. we've fought hard, showed our true abilities, showed others the rafflesian spirit.
after our team prayer, after my last visualisation, i took my paddle, my life vest, i walked down the beach to the water. it was the last time i'm gliding through the water with all my might, my last time wearing the jersey, the life jacket, last time using my faithful old boat. last race.
as i did my last warm up and waited with anxiety and excitement for that last horn, i knew it was then or never. the past year and a half of training, all the shit that we've been through, the sweat, the blood, the pain for that one race. we rowed like never before, every pull, every twist, every effort. it was close, and it might have been possible, but it didn't happen. it was the best i've done, but i couldn't help feeling disappointed for something so near yet so far, something which i had always wanted. well, it's over.
as i watched and cheered for the later races, i've felt the real meaning behind canoeing. winning isn't everything. in fact, we are all winners, for we've given our best for the school, with the blasting cheers of "go raffles" from the jetty, we have shown the determination, the team spirit, the school spirit, the pride, and all these are worth so much more than a gold.
after the prize presentation, as we all gathered around the school flag for college anthem, i was trying to hold back tears as i sang. not tears of joy or sorrow, but tears of pride in being a raffles canoeist. the college anthem never meant so much. "we'll do our best whate'er the test, and keep our colours flying..." green, black, white, flying with pride. i know that is where i belong, that is what i am. i daresay that the best thing that happened in my life is joining canoeing and even though i may not wear my jersey, row in my boat, but deep in my heart, i'm always a raffles canoeist.
post nationals night, probably the last night we're going to spend together, 11 of us, all so unique in our own ways, yet so indispensable. we've been through so much together, trainings, sdba, scf, dragon boat and i'm so glad i've found friends like you. to my k2 partner, fengyi, thank you for being the power behind me, everything couldn't be possible without you. to my twin, weiqi, you're great and the team couldn't have come so far without you. to shine, my classmate and teammate, you're certainly the nicest person i've known and thank you so much for hearing all my crap all day. to mag and sheryl, you all have certainly shown the spirit and trainings wouldn't be the same without you. to carol, thanks for all the joy. to gaoshang, the team will never be the same without you, your lame jokes and stories which brought so much laughter. to lydia, thanks for always being there and your valuable contributions to the team, to zhen, you're really indispensible and thank you for everything and to vania, you're shown us what's the meaning of a real fighter and intervals would never be possible without you. to jiaxin, gosh, you're really good, to jiaying, you're really strong, inside and outside and keep the spirit going, revenge will be sweet next year. to jingting and youjia, you all are great and we are all so proud of you and to yonghui, you are wonderful, keep it going and from now on, it's all yours, bring your team to greater heights, work hard and achieve what your goals, the next year will be challenging and let it be fruitful. to my teammates, thank you so much and i can't imagine my life without you. let us all work hard together for A levels and we are raffles canoeists forever. to the j1s, be proud of raffles canoeing and raffles canoeing will be proud of you.
enough said, the rest will remain in my memories. forever and ever.

it's only one more week. i can't believe it's going to be over so fast. seems like everything had just happened yesterday.  i still remember a few years ago when i see canoes in kallang river from sheare's bridge, i would be thinking: i want to canoe too. and yes, now my dream came true. kallang is my second home. going there at least 2 times a week, i smell like kallang, i've tasted kallang, dreamt of kallang and even think like kallang. it was only last year that i first sat in a competition boat and embarrassing to say, i fell out from the other side. and now i'm counting down the number of trainings, the number of times i've to wash and carry boats, the number of times i'm going home all wet and dirty...
yet, i've this mixed feeling in me. no doubt that i'm going to miss those things that has already become my weekly routine, but on the other hand, i'm kind of looking forward to it. the days when i can plan and carry out my own gym training programme, when i can run as much and as slowly as i want to, without having the pressure to cut my previous timings, i would love to go for hours of fat-burning jogs, exploring new routes. and i no longer have to control my diet, and my mom will have no more excuse to force me to eat meat again. is it this freedom that i'm looking forward to? i don't know. all i know is that i'll definitely not stop canoeing after nationals, because it's my passion, it's my pride to be a canoeist and i know i'm definitely going to miss the time we spent in the weights room together, as a team, our team runs and all the fun we've had together.
one more week, and it's time to mark the end of our canoeing life in rjc. but it'll take a lifetime, and it's still not enough to eradicate the friendship that we've built. love you guys lots and i can't imagine my jc life without a bunch of friends like you.
aspire, endure, perservere, kill
we can achieve, if we believe, the power we hold within

another week of school has just passed, common test results were generally unsatisfactory, but how much can i expect? trained 3 days in a row, and finally ran today after 5 long days because it was raining, i was letting my poor knees rest, i was allowing my blisters to heal. yeah, all sorts of reasons. just when i was happily walking to the busstop with the fact that my knees worked perfectly well during the run, it started aching again. but it was a great improvement from last week and they feel ok now.
watched super size me with the team yesterday, we were rushing like mad after training to catch the 3.30 show. my first time being to shaw tower and the cinema wasn't as empty as what i expected. and yes, the movie, it was quite a good documentary, and i'm still sppalled by the fact that he can eat nothing but macdonalds 3 meals a day for 30 days. totally insane. not a fan of macdonalds, i was so disgusted by the way he stuffed himself with the fats and sugar, puking from over-eating and almost killed his livers. what great harm fast foods cause. really hope this movie can evoke some emotions of fast food lovers and cause them to live a more healthy lifestyle. some parts of the movie were really funny, especially when his wife described how his diet affected their sex life, how she had to go on top and it was harder for him to get it up. haha. and just as the movie was showing him munching on the burgers, carol was simultaneously having her burger king lunch. i think the worst part was when they showed a gigantic tub of sugar and fats at the end of the movie, the amount he consumed in the past month. yucks.
i'm so thankful i've not eaten any fast food this year, as long as i can remember, and i haven't had a burger for a year? i'm swearing off fast food, completely, they're nothing but fats and sugar.
and the most ironic thing is when i was flipping the papers this morning, i was an advertisement on macdonalds, promoting healthy diet. haha, what a joke.

why am i doing this? still holding on to it knowing it's not going to get me anywhere. today, i chose to escape, or to put it nicely, i chose not to waste one hour staring and laughing at the paper and writing rubbish. but what is one hour compared to hours spent getting my brain confused and trying to keep my eyes open. why should i betray my heart, sometimes i would rather let my heart overrule and give my mind a break. afterall, how can i succeed in something which i don't even enjoy. but do i have a choice now? i can't escape forever. i'm going to get myself out of this. when there's a will, there's a way. the only way i can think of now is nothing but MUG!!!

ok, shall not let my blog die. it's just another saturday, training was quite good, first time doing k2 with huilin and she's damn stable, felt like i could do anything in front, and to fy, gs and carol, have fun kicking those balls and if you injure yourself i'm not going to forgive you.
i feel damn motivated, damn psyched up now, for everything, thanks a lot huh, for your "encouragement" i'm not what you think i am and leave me alone, just like i can't be bothered with you. you're incorrigible.

common tests are over, finally. not expecting much since i didn't put in much, not that i don't want to, but there's just no time. yeah, i know this is going to be the last and the worst common test ever. i feel so free now, no school tomorrow, no school on monday, life's getting good.
watched spiderman 2 today, haven't watched a movie for quite some time and it was a great show, better than the first one, which i can't really remember the whole plot. good way to destress after common tests.
i'm so bored that i might just wake up in the middle of the night to watch euro 2004 though i'm definitely not a soccer fan

some things which i don't understand about me:
- why can't i concentrate on mugging?
- why can't i understand econs
- why am i such an exercise freak
- why can't i stop examining the fat and nutrition content of all the food i eat
- why can't i grow taller
- why can't i get rid of the disgusting jiggling fats
- why can't i sleep past 7am
- why do i have no ball sense
- why am i writing this when common test is tomorrow

some things which i don't understand about people
- why can some people mug a whole day without food and sleep
- why can some people never get fat no matter how much they eat
- and why can some people never get thin
- why are some people so hard-to-get
- why are some overly optimistic
- why are some people so childish
- why do people do harm to themselves
- why are some people just so nice
- why are you reading this crap

some things which i don't understand about life:
- why is life so vulnerable
- why do some people come and go
- why can there never be world peace

BEAUTIFUL ICE PRINCESS/PRINCE .You need distance
between you and your partner in your
relationship. You are very difficult to get.
You have big requirements and this one you love
must try hard to get you. But after she/he melt
your heart she/he will be the most happy person
in the world. You need someone who shoes you
that you are special and it makes you feel
good to see that you are loved. She/He shall
know that you could easily get another
girl/boyfriend but you wont as long as you
love him. when she/he hurts you you will hurt
him too, but in general you dont get hurt. If
your partner cheated you ,you would react cold
and immediately (try to) forget him


~THE big LOVE TEST!! What do you need? With PICS! For girls and boys!~
brought to you by Quizilla

i don't understand how some people can be so irritating. stop pissing me off!!! you're the most busybody person i've ever known, in fact, i don't really know you so mind your own business!!!!
training today as usual and stayed to do enrichment, which means another day spent at kallang burning my skin away. for some reasons the white stripe on the sji k2s just annoys me. but the triathlon warm-up was quite enjoyable, swimming across the river, running back and push-ups, thank god it was high tide, something different at least. oh man, i didn't realise it, it's only less than 10 water trainings to nationals. wow, ok psyche up must make the most out of every training.

time flies... school is starting in less than 2 weeks time and what have i been doing? quite busy these few days, starting with dragon boat on sunday. yes, we were all so disappointed, so near yet so far, it felt like history's repeating, nevertheless, we've enjoyed ourselves, the 2 trainings we had prior to the race, seeing team spirit into action with everyone rowing the race of our lives. of course we were eyeing the medals, but i think the experience that we've brought back is more important.
outing after that was, as usual, chaotic, haha. stuffing ourselves with the free flow of bread at cafe cartel, watching how people eat and cut ribs, gs, your cutting skills really suck, haha. and the fun we had with the banana, with carol still innocently enjoying her desert despite so much hints, and the "horror" on her face when the truth was finally revealed, haha. thank you so much, lele. we couldn't have done without you and the dinner, card and everything else are still insufficient to express our heartfelt gratitude, you're just so great. and as usual, we ended our outing with a drink, this time it was coffee at tcc. it was a nice environment for, erm, making a fool of ourselves, with the 2 porns and their kinky actions and poses and our laughter that could be heard a mile away. you guys are the best people around, i can't imagine how different my jc life would be if i had not joined canoeing. the fun we have together is unique, it's hard to find a group of friends, so different as individuals but with the same passion and can talk so openly about things like, well, you know what.
2 days of cip camp followed, it was quite a good experience and looking after kids is not easy, especially when you get hyperactive kids who have very short attention span and can't stop running around, i pity the guys in my group who had to run after them and dragging them back into the LT. it was tiring but felt much more rewarding than other cips like flag day. eddy is such a sweet boy, he is very rude, vulgar and playful, but he still has that innocent and shy side. it's like he appreciates what you do for him but finds it so hard to show. alright, no more cip hours needed but i don't mind a camp like this again.

3 parts of training today should make up for 2 days of idleness and the food that i've been eating. macritchie is such a fabulous place to run, especially in this morning's weather. ended with dragon boat, we wanted to find a boat to pace but the whole flock of boats happily went back to sdba while we waited and hoped that they would turn back. dragon boat training wasn't bad, felt much better than previous training. oh yeah, sunday is the day, it was suppose to be saturday but guest-of-honour not free. whatever.. it will still be fun...
feeling this itchiness to go for singapore triathlon, so tempting, but but... firstly, it's so damn expensive!!!! like almost 100 bucks!?!?!? secondly, it'll be damn near prelims and most importantly, i'm going to embarrass myself by coming in last or something..