day 0 of my freedom, i bought a huge cup of bubble tea, went home, chatted with my mom, went for db trng, had dinner, watched movie and went airport to fetch my dad.
day 1, i woke up early as usual, went for a run that i've been wanting to do so badly for the last 4 days, yes it's more of an addiction than a plan to lose weight, took a long bath, stoned, went out for ktv, then back home and finally watched GG, i've been so disciplined for the past few weeks!
i thought the excitement of freedom could last longer, but i was wrong. right now on just day 1, the lost feeling is back again. lack of directions, lack of goals in life. i knew it right from the start, i cannot do nothing. and sadly, with my limited knowledge and experience, i cannot do anything either.
life's short, play hard, it's easy to say, but how hard can we play? always admired those travellers who give up their career, carry their backpack and off they go, or even better, get their butts on their bicycle and off they go to conquer the world. make some money, spend them, and make more. that's not about time, not about bravery, it's about courage to live life the way you want it to be. and i know i am not capable of that.
so when will my heart and mind ever settle down? when can i let someone else into it? the problem doesn't lie with who, the problem lies with me.