so sick and tired of being who i am or who i'm trying to become. no direction in life at all..
feels like my brain is not back from its holidays yet. can't bring myself to start studying again. random little thoughts and distractions just keep popping out in my mind.
i see the old me appearing again. somethings should never be lost and some better not be found.
the bottle of vodka's opened, cheers anyone?

山东04.04 - 06.04
day 1 in 济南




day 2 climbing 泰山.
10am to 8pm. up and down the mountain. 1545m vertically, 7000+ steps, about 20km of walking and braving the crowd!!
best souvenir: VERY sore legs

setting off..

人山人海 literally..

the toughest 500m..

almost to the peak

finally reached!!

the way down wasn't easy

走到太阳下山了

finally made it down!

day 3 in 曲阜 - home of Confucius


that's how he looks like supposedly

幸福是早晨起来喝一杯热咖啡或奶茶；
幸福是沿着河边，听着音乐，晒着春天的阳光，在红花绿叶的陪伴下慢跑；
幸福是中午啃个大苹果，吃袋凉拌菜，一串冰糖葫芦；
幸福是下午准备晚餐，喝碗热汤；
幸福是晚上钻进温暖的被窝睡个好觉；
幸福是上个星期游山，这个星期玩水；
原来快乐是选择，
但那是真正的幸福，还是只是快乐？

just when i was admiring the blooming flowers and leaves growing from the bald trees while jogging in the park yesterday, it snowed today!! just a little but wth!
almost died of boredom staying at home the whole day, watching youtube and looking at food and recipes. yeah, i've a paper tomorrow but tell me how to concentrate and study when the brain's too occupied thinking of how to keep the body warm? wearing 2 layers of socks now but where are my toes?
i should be learning about viruses and stuff, but looks like i'm having more fun experimenting with microwave..

speaking of drastic weather change, how about experiencing winter to summer in less than a week? just last friday it was still at freezing point with wind so strong that we were glad to even make it to sch in the morning. then was nice and sunny spring which changed to a close to 30 degrees summer today!
in the midst of planning the holiday trips and places to go on weekends, the fact that exams are less than 2 weeks away hasn't set in yet. i do admit it feels less stressful than last sem, more time at hand to sleep more, run more, but when good is never enough and competition with the little voice in myself and strive for perfection never ends, satisfaction is almost impossible.
delusion and self-denial crashed when my mind reached its semi conscious state, and it all came back in my dreams.
really enjoy running along the river, even though it may end up as a dream that never realised, the process would be all i ask for. perhaps it was never a passion lost, it just needed to be found again.
花还没开，树还是光秃秃的，难道春天已过去了？
如今明白了为什么人们常说美好的事物大多都是短暂，但庆幸我没错过这短暂的美好，却也知道过去的就不会再回来。

one and a half weeks into my second sem here and i've been keeping to my new sem resolution. well, i guess it's not that hard when the resolution is play more, study less. 2 ktv sessions, a trip to tianjin and more trips to come. watched a few movies, shopping, been going for long runs in the cold, and sleeping at 12ish everyday. too much time??? better enjoy now before the workload builds up.
if i'm crazy enough to run down the river, finding where it starts and ends, there are people even more insane to swim in the puddle of water surrounded by ice in trunks, coming out of the water, wrap a towel and change out of his trunks in public!!
or did stress and fyp bring out insanity in others? then i should have stabbed someone, slit my wrist and jumped off the building long ago..

back in the winter, back to the house where much time was spent making it home, back to the room and study table which kept me company through the dark nights, back to my favourite bedtime activity of cuddling in bed with my laptop.
we finally went to sing ktv, very cheap, very big and fanciful room with 1 big screen and 3 small screens, disco lights etc, and best thing of all, perfectly decent.
somethings are best left as it is, some needs another breakthrough. another mission impossible, should i or shouldn't i??
goodnight world

当以往的狂欢共乐已成为今日的孤单芭蕾，
当熟悉的画面已面目全非，
当纯真的快乐已无法进入心灵，
终于体会岁月不留人，
挥手告别童年，
情人节快乐。

then there was the most horrible train ride back on 人日. that was when i learnt 'non-aircon' doesn't imply temperature, it implies 'smoking is allowed'. and so i endured more than 15 hours of secondhand smoke, people eating, spitting all over. almost died of boredom too before i finally made it back to BJ to do my post-cny spring cleaning.
then was my first time taking a plane alone. speaking of kiasu-ness, i nominate myself for reaching the airport half an hour before check-in started (that's 3 and a half hours before the flight). luckily i had shows in my laptop to provide some entertainment.

如今又回到了这里，这熟悉的环境，熟悉的面孔，熟悉的感觉，仿佛一切又回到了昨天。

还是让我用中文写完这春节的中国游吧。年初三的三更半夜，我从温暖的被窝里爬出来，坐了五个多小时的车来到了这次旅程中的第三座山－黄山。说是三日游，实际上只在山上呆了一天。
第一天的安排是山下的自由活动。我们的第一个景点是九龙瀑。还以为山下活动只是坐坐车，拍拍照，没想到要走那么多路，那么多阶梯！不过为了这些景物，是值得的。


有山有水，一路上绿色盎然，加上走得满头大汗，根本没有冬天的感觉。



像不像一只乌龟？


看完了水，该是看石了。于是我们到了下一站－凤凰源


头上戴朵花的癞蛤蟆



远看像两个棺材



近看像四个美女



从后面看像一个拳头

猪八戒吃西瓜

毛主席的头


虽然旅馆每晚给开8个小时的空调，但山区的冬天一点也不暖和。
第二天，我们正式上黄山。但天不作美，让我们碰上了阴天。

从旅馆窗户看出去已是一片雾蒙蒙，山上的雾更是可想而知。


说是旅游淡季，也是人山人海。我们坐缆车，在云海中从陆地消失，真像升上了天。


手机石



睡美人？还是男人？



在山上冒着风冒着雨，走了一整天就为了看这棵迎客松。


人说上山气喘，下山腿软，的确如此。
又在山下过了一晚，吃了一顿手冻的连筷子都拿不了的晚餐，第三天早上我们就坐车回去了，结束了黄山游。

next up, a journey back to childhood, tradition and the real winter.
following my first time taking the train alone, which i spent 10 out of 12 hours sleeping, was my first chinese new year not spent with my parents.
it was a great training for my tolerance of cold, with no heaters in the house, no need to put on any extra jacket when going out of the house, cos there's no temperature difference, and my fingers and toes never felt warm the moment i got out of bed.
it was quite an experience, going to the public bath and walking home with hair FROZEN. and having water supply only twice a day, and i finally knew why the taps are always dripping, it's to prevent the pipes from freezing. that was pre-cny, with half the time spent in front of the tv, felt great not having anything to do.
stocking up for CNY making good use of nature's fridge:




my only source of most readily available warmth..



then in the midst of sounds of firecrackers, spring came.
now i understand and fully support the ban on firecrackers. even walking around the neighbourhood felt life-threatening. things may explode anytime, anywhere. playing with the pretty fireworks brought out the mischievous child in me, i almost set a patch of grass on fire, oops.. and look what we did:



hanging little duckies fireworks outside ppl's windows heh


then came 正月初一, i was awakened by the sounds of firecrackers. it was really 炮竹响连天. every few minutes a bunch of firecrackers will go off, and i heard at least 2 ambulance sirens!



the aftermath.


and look what i've found:

the most ancient camera i've seen!



next up, the third mountain..

this winter holidays has been a journey through history, tradition, nature, etc.. and i've found myself a new 'hobby' and exercise - climbing mountains, or rather, walking stairs. and also discovered some interesting answers..
the journey began right after the last paper..
part 1: 西安
after a night's train ride, and listening to stories told enthusiastically by our new-found friend sharing the same cabin, we were greeted by the ancient architecture of the historic town. our first stop was 骊山.



bringing to you the first mountain!



apparently i didn't register majority of what the tourguide said, but the xian incident does sound like something learnt before in history.

then we hopped around the area visiting the burial ground of 秦始皇 and other historical landmarks before 8th wonder of the world - 兵马俑





百闻不如一见


the first day ended with 华清池








杨贵妃 bathed there.

day 2 was one huge mountain - 华山





although we took the cablecar up, it was still a long walk and many flights of stairs to reach the peaks.









day 3: more tombs and more 兵马俑s






















last stop for the day: 法门寺 before a long busride back to the city



金龟!!


and we spent the night in the city, walking down the street trying and buying local food!







day 4 and last day in xi'an was spent on the 城墙 that surrounds the city, cycled around it for my last bit of exercise before the feast begins.






our last lunch there, looks yummy doesn't it?





and lastly, asia's largest musical fountain, which was under maintenance every tuesday. how lucky =(




and that concludes our xi'an trip.
a long wait at the train station, and another night spent in the train, and my journey continues...